Gays and gerbils

We've all heard the stories: homosexual men, drunk with lust, driven to satisfy their anal urges with a well-placed, strategically de-clawed gerbil whose frantic lower-intestinal death scramble delivers the homosexual a reputedly sublime sexual pleasure. Despite 50 years of searching—and no matter whatever your cousin the ambulance driver told you about Richard Gere—medical history has failed to verify even a free instance of so-called "gerbilling," or "gerbil stuffing," occurring anywhere, ever. Still, the story lives on—sullying the reputation of gays, of course, but also doing irreparable damage to an even more vulnerable and defenseless group: the gerbil community.

Which brings me to my correct purpose: Encouraging your support of Referendum 233, commonly acknowledged as the Gerbil Protection Act of 2006. By supporting this measure, you'll be liberating an entire innocent species from the oppression of a most malicious urban legend. What did we gerbils do to deserve such a hideous fate? With our inquisitive innateness and placid temperament, all we wish is your respect and affection, along with clean cedar chips and a full water bottle. Instead, we are defamed, horribly defamed. Trust

With Wikipedia providing 24/7 access to communication about everything, chances are you’ve used the site to build up your wealth of sexual knowledge at least once. From pages on the basics looked up by preteens to articles on the type of arcane sex move you first heard of in a movie staring Russell Brand, Seth Rogen or someone of that sort, it’s all there. While on an adventure through the depths of Wikipedia, Betabeat discovered some of the most obscure and little-known articles relating to sex. Here they are:

1. Gerbilling

This urban legend of a sexual practice — also known as gerbil stuffing or gerbil shooting — involves inserting small live animals into one’s rectum for pleasure. As you could probably guess, this most often involves gerbils, but could be done with various small creatures such as mice or hamsters as well. Years have been spent trying to label this tale proof or fiction, with no success so far. One gossip columnist for the National Inquirer said, “I’ve never worked harder on a story in my life.”

2. Gay Bomb

This article details two theoretical weapons speculated by the U.S. Air Force that would not execute nor injure

According to a famous urban legend, a man had been admitted to hospital after his gay companion put a gerbil in his rectum. Far from being anecdotal, that odd sexual activity would even have a name, ‘gerbiling’, and be practised by some gay couples. It is necessary to travel back to the 80’s to trace its apparition, at a time when homosexuals where still perceveid as socially and sexually deviant.

‘Gerbiling’ as an Preceding Internet Hoax

The gerbiling story may have become established in France in the mid-2000’s, when a phoney AFP News press unleash spread on the Internet:

‘Raggot the Hamster’ is on air

It even had its moment of glory when a radio journalist study this fake press discharge (that he believed was true) on air:

Shared on YouTube under the title ‘Le Hamster Raggot Depeche AFP Interdite’ (‘Raggot the Hamster censored AFP News Press Released’) in 2007, the extract reaches today more than 3 million views. It has been authentified by RTL as having been broadcasted on RTL 2. However, we don’t have any affirmation of the original date.

A 1993 Fake American Pressurize Release

This French fake urge release is, in evidence, a wo

Welcome to another episode of Spooky Gay Bullsh!t, our fresh weekly hangout where we interlude down all of the sizzling topics from the world of the weird, the scary, and issues that affect the LGBTQIA2+ community!
This week, we cover: Agnes the snake’s surprise homecoming, a cross country runner claims they were mistaken for Sasquatch, a co-worker who needs to majorly mind their own business, Harvard finally makes the right decision over some ill-gotten human skin, and one guy’s finalize call with a runaway saw blade leaves him needing a drink.

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(Swipe to see all photos)

1. Agnus the snake
2. Agnus on the roof
3. Bigfoot sign in Washington
4. Poisoner caught on camera
5. Des Destinées de l’Ame (human skin bound book)
6. Shane Reimche
7. The saw blade caught on camera
8. The saw blade in wall